Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Introduction

And now I'm scared to sleep at night,
When these dreams take hold of me.
But the one thing I won't admit is,
That they're not all I see.
It's patchy vision, most of the time,
But there's no one there with me.
No second witness, no second eyes,
As the visions start to flee.

Friday, October 12, 2012

Know

Oh I wish that I could hold you
And tell you how lovely you are.
How lucky I am.
Then never let go.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Complex

This feeling is back, this panic's attack,
And it feels like I'm falling with no one to catch.
So I hold my head strong and bear my eyes wide,
But I can't keep down this poison inside.

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Inertia

Do you remember when you were my boat,
And I was the sea?
Were you lost as you rode on top of me?

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Beautiful

The next morning I looked at the city's black halo,
In the wake of that toxic volcano.
It was after your death but I wanted you to know;
I finally looked and saw the rainbow.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Transient

You were never my wolf,
You were never my saviour.
You were merely a passing: last week's flavour.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Accused

Ring, ring. Your phone starts to sing,
A voice wants to know if the dealer's in.
Tick, tick. It's paranoia's click,
Wondering how she got your digit.
Tick, tock. Her act won't drop,
And all you want is the questions to stop.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Abandoned

In August one night, my Cabbie said
"Don't cry! Everything's going to be alright."
That was the night I dropped my sapphire down the sink
And cried through the night, clawing at the U-bend.
I woke up the next day, still in tears
And realised that's what love was always going to be like.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Hot

Did I sleep til Spring?
I knew I'd missed something.
Now Summer's heat
Envelops the street
Hungry for something living to eat.
I guess I'll hide
Too hot outside
Watching and waiting while others thrive.

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Thief

You stole my soul,
Destroyed my physique.
You made me this girl who was quiet and meek.

You broke me down,
Then broke my heart.
It hurt so much to fall apart.

But now you're back,
Condemning my scene.
I've finally moved on, why can't you see?

I can't stand that you stole my identity,
I wish you'd stopped. You could never take the hints,
But I know that you stole my finger prints.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Parades

Are you haunting still?
It took a while but I wrote that will.
But each night when you visit your spirit shakes my hold,
So I go right back and I write it in bold.
There's nothing of me left to be yours
So leave me alone, no more ghosts at my doors.

Solitude

"You were the only person who ever made me feel complete,"
You said, through inappropriate means.
You said you "wished you'd fought, more," for me.
But how is that fair, my fickle "friend",
When now it's you and her, "til the end"?
Well I've now moved on, I know you'll groan,
But I think you deserve to be on your own.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Young

Even in the darkness he tasted like sunshine,
Smelt like salt and had arms stronger than the tide.
All he had to do was pull me under.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Autumn

We drove upstate today, in silence.
I saw the red-orange leaves, fallen from trees,
And realised it was winter. I didn't see the leaves fall at home.
Did I miss Autumn? You were off flying overseas,
What was my excuse?
The leaves had fallen and I was busy, hallucinating, off my face,
Too busy distracting myself to notice the seasons change.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Ecchymosis

Finally, I'll admit it, it's true:
I'm black and blue all over you.
But here I am, without a clue,
Are you bruising for me, too?

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Coverup

"I'll love you just the way you are," he whispered, "if you're perfect."
And so I tried and I tried to be perfect.
Self medicating day in, day out,
Starving myself to the bones and beyond.
Dying and ripping and covering,
Dripping concealer over who I really was.

Friday, June 1, 2012

Heart Breaker

You were in my dreams again last night,
And I couldn't stand your face.
Everywhere I go, I always see your face.
I loved you so much and I know you felt the same,
Yet you hurt me so and I'm the one you blame.

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Solitaire

For a girl afraid of her own shadow,
She sure acts tough.
She clenches her fists, acts bravado,
But is that really enough?

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Dry Spell

A month without lips.
Two months counting, no hips.
Toes on the line, biding my time
When I find what I want, I'll make it mine.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Bleary

At first the drugs were to take away the pain
That fuzzy sensation of peace, like a blanket, enveloping.
But the pain kept coming back, tenfold,
Until, gradually, it was the pain and the loss, that enveloped.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Capsule

I'm almost out of sleeping pills.
How will I sleep against my wills? 
The sun it sets and the night is dark
But I cannot rest my mind or heart.
I don't know how I'll sleep next week:
I'm out of pills to make me sleep.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Fissure

Now when I stop trying, the flesh seems to melt;
Too small for my skirts, too small for my belt.
I've never felt heavier then I do today,
I never wanted us to end this way.

Monday, April 30, 2012

Olympian

At the front of a dance floor. In front of the booth.
I met a Greek God and here's my proof:
Chiseled by the greatest, he's meant to be the fakest.
But he's more real than stone and stronger than bone.
He's got dark brown hair and ripped golden flesh:
And I think he's ready to take my test...

Friday, April 27, 2012

Hope

And it's only when she's flying that she doesn't feel down,
So the drugs kill her slowly while she's painting the town.
She lets herself go as they ease through her mind,
Leaving the memories and the tears behind.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Thomas

With your inebriated brain and your arrogant heart,
You thought you didn't need me and weren't you smart?

Now you say you that love me, that you need me back,
Do you really expect me to "cut you some slack"?

It's all sugar coated, the things that you say,
But why would I want you, either way?

It's so hard to be brave, it's so hard to be nice,
Was it really worth it for that fleeting tryst?

Now everything's over and we're so far apart,
When all that I wanted was you, from the start.

My tears have ended and there's not much of me left,
But it feels so good to have you off my chest.

Friday, April 13, 2012

Betrayal

You tore my heart into so many pieces,
I never knew I could be so speechless.
But now that I'm so torn apart,
The only sound is this beating heart.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Cheat

How could you hurt me in the one way I would never hurt you?
How could you break that one thing left, the one thing that would lead me to success?

Monday, March 26, 2012

Rattled

She feels like she's falling,
So she takes his prescription.
That's when he starts to crave a little friction.
He spins her round, he grips her hand,
She never could quite understand...

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Spaced

She's coked up, gets choked up
So she drinks down, gets fucked around.
She's such a mess, can't take the stress
So she takes a pill, goes for the kill...

Friday, March 9, 2012

Unisom

I drug myself to sleep
And struggle then to rise.
It's not much of a living
But how else to survive?

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Hidden

At the bottom of bags and deep in my phone,
I keep finding notes of misery's moan.
I can't stop the voices, all through my head,
I can't keep it down, this bubbling dread...

Trainer

I met you a night I was floating on glass,
I struggled to feel but could sense your pass.
You always look good when I'm a mess,
You always sound good, your voice's caress.

Friday, February 17, 2012

Toronto

Will I make my flight?
I couldn't sleep last night. In this big empty bed, all alone, brimming with dread. I cradle my bones as this strange city moans, I wish you could hold me, take me home.