Tuesday, August 25, 2009


1. im sorry that i dont appreciate you like i should. im sorry i feel defensive of you and sometimes feel like others win you over. i want to be closest to you, youre that amazing and magical and i love you so much, you are the best friend i could ever have. we have a lot of history as friends so i guess i well always have this.
but i guess i can master the material, i can be the creative, i guess i can be the magician

2. im sorry that you just like me as a friend. i really thought i felt something (and i thought you felt it too) but i guess its just too hard and it wont work because im just too f*****.
but i guess i can be alone looking down from my throne, i guess i can be the empress

3. im sorry that everyone just loves you so much more than they love me. i swear my own parents would rather you were their own child at times! i suck at the silent treatment and cant fight with you cos youre too lovely. im sorry im such a horrible person with such hostility and profanities. im sorry were on different levels
but i guess i can just be the dumb one, i guess i can be the fool

4. im sorry that you cant see what a good friend i am. im sorry that you dont realise i am here for you, defending you constantly to those that talk in hushed voices. im sorry that you dont feel the need to notice me escape into the night or to say sorry or to acknowledge me at all anymore. im sorry that you hate me and im sorry that you cried.
but i guess if we cant talk ill be intuitive and mysterious, too, i guess i can be the high preistess

5. im sorry that youre upset, that you didnt have a good night. im sorry that you feel like the way people acts makes your viewpoint differ. im sorry youre so confused and that youre so confusing. im sorry that that i didnt meet you earlier you are amazing.
but i guess that everyone at our age is confused, i guess we, or, i guess i can be the moon

6. im sorry we were never friends before. im sorry that other people made us have an unusual friendship and im sorry to everyone that we made people think they had to defend and define themselves as a better group
but i guess we can pull on together, through this fog-like strangeness, i guess i can be strength

7. im sorry im a wishy-washy friend. im sorry im not always there. and im sorry ive made mistakes. im sorry we dont maintain our afternoon adventures more. i cant wait for our adventures in six weeks. im sorry we dont have those immediate connections others have
but i guess together we can be the wanderers through unknown lands, i guess i can be the hermit

i guess the justice card is missing
i guess we should all kiss and makeup and find the missing one in the spread.
i guess then the scales will be balanced...
maybe? i want a star, the world, i am the devil too, and death. im the pack.